Where’s the Doulaing?

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Doulaing, you say?  Hmmm, that also sounds vaguely familiar…

You can add this to the list of bandwagons I’ve fallen off of, and hopefully this is the last installment in the impromptu “vaguely familiar” series, haha! (Part 1, Part 2)

Last December, 2013, I thought I had finally found my calling and I signed up for a four day Doula training workshop at Mother Tree (one of THE places to train in Portland).  The workshop seemed to confirm everything I was thinking about becoming a Doula and it felt so right.  Friends and family thought it was perfect for me and I felt like God was opening doors and leading the way, I was so excited!

But then, last Summer, I worked with two clients.  Two amazing clients who trusted me as a student and invited me into their lives for an extremely personal, intimate, and miraculous occasion.  I was honored, and still so excited, but also a bundle of nerves.

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(such a cute print – Etsy & Society 6)

I felt absolutely useless at my first client’s birth.  I knew my first would be awkward and I’d get more comfortable the more I did, but I felt so out of place.  It was her third baby so she knew what she was doing, but I didn’t.  I hadn’t met the husband yet, and I was fine with that until the day of the birth, we introduced ourselves and then I was trying to figure out our balance.  If I tried to comfort her would he think I was stepping on his toes, would he think he should have been the one to do it?  I ended up letting him handle things if she was closer to him, and if she was closer to me I’d try, but I was NOT a natural, and that really surprised me.  I do know I’m more quiet and reserved, but I also think I’m empathetic and compassionate and figured I’d be much better at offering comfort and encouragement.  I just hope I didn’t take anything away from their experience by being there in all my awkwardness.

With my second client I was probably too open about my feelings and nerves, I didn’t really have a client filter on my mouth.  She was someone I had started to get to know as a friend beforehand because of other connections, and I think all my sharing-as-a-friend did nothing to promote confidence in my abilities to care for them during their birth.  I should have employed the time-tested method of “fake it till you make it”.

I will forever be grateful to these two clients!  Even though I ultimately decided NOT to continue pursuing the Doula path, it was an extremely clear and easy decision.  Why not?  Well, even with the awkward learning experiences above, the one thing I wasn’t the least bit worried about ended up being the thing I hated most, and there’s no way around it:  being on-call.

As a doula you start being on-call 24/7 when the mother is 38 weeks, and if she goes past her due date, her Doctor may allow her to go until 42 weeks before inducing.  For every client there is a potential of 4 weeks on-call.  In order for me to stay busy enough as a Doula to make it my full-time job, I would have had to take on mom’s with due dates about 3 weeks apart, and with that 4 week potential, it would mean way more on-call time than off.

What exactly did I hate about being on-call?

  • Needed to stay within a 1-2 hour radius of where the mom is planning to give birth, for obvious reasons.  This is negotiable with the mom, but you want to stay close so you can get there ASAP when she needs you.
  • Needed to stay in cell-phone range at all times, again, for obvious reasons.  This can also be negotiated with the mom beforehand.  For example, when I was on call last Summer we were talking about going hiking and I had to tell Mr. Won’t Run that wasn’t an option since I wouldn’t want to risk losing cell service, especially if I got the call at the top of a mountain, then we’d have to hurry back down and speed back into town.  As a Doula you are in very close contact with the mother, if she’s 38 weeks and not showing any labor signs at all then you’re probably good to go if she signs off, it’s not like you’d drive 90 minutes out for an eight mile hike if she was 40 weeks and had lost her mucus plug.
  • The main reason… I slept terrible!  Even though the phone is right next to me at night and I’d check, double-check, and triple-check that the volume was on and it was plugged in and charging, I was sure the one call or text I’d miss would be theirs.  I thought it would be easier with the second client, but it wasn’t, and I can’t live like that.  Mr. Won’t Run will tell you, I neeeeed my sleep.

These reasons really aren’t the end of the world, and I know a lot of people who don’t mind being on-call at all, but it was CLEARLY not for me.  I’m okay with that, but really disappointed since it seemed like all signs were pointing towards being a Doula.  I am still fascinated by all things menstrual/fertility/pregnancy/labor/baby, but I’m not really sure what to do with that.  Placenta Encapsulation?  Infant Massage?  Sonogram Tech?  I don’t know…

So… it’s still the 8-5 grind at my cubicle day job, but it pays the bills and I can’t knock that!

Do you feel like you’re working your calling?

Where’s the Blogging?

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Blogging, you say?  Hmmm, sounds vaguely familiar…

We’re a little over nine weeks into 2015 and this is my first post of the year, and there were only 15 posts last year.  I’m pretty sure they’re going to revoke my blogger credentials soon.  So I signed up for a blogging conference, because that makes total sense when you haven’t been blogging much, right?

I recently found out that a couple of local gals, Lauren (Lauren’s Latest) and Christie (Blake & Co. Events), have organized Indulge Conference right her in Portland!

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Part of what sealed the deal for me is that Bev (Bev Cooks) and Kristen (Dine & Dish, Red Faced Runners) are both speaking, and I love them.  However, you’ll notice this is a conference for food bloggers and that’s not exactly how I’d classify myself.  Sure, I love food and I enjoy posting about local restaurants, but I’m not the greatest at cooking food or coming up with my own recipes, although I’d love to get more into that with the way we’re trying to eat healthier these days (a post on Whole30 is coming soon).

It’s intimidating to see some of the bloggers who are coming because they are LEGIT food bloggers, geniuses that make up their own recipes, work with major brands, post 3-5 times a week, and have a bazillion followers.  Not that I should compare where I’m at now with where they’re at now, I’m pretty sure blogging is a full time job for most of them and it’s not for me and that’s okay.

It’s still a bit intimidating and I’m sure I’ll feel a little like an imposter (has anyone seen my self-confidence, I seem to have lost it, haha), but I’m looking for some blogging inspiration and this sounds perfect.  They also posted this about the conference on the website…

  • Are you a food blogger? (new or experienced)
  • Have you heard about the delicious Portland food scene? 
  • Have you ever traveled here to experience it yourself?
  • Do you like connecting with your food-loving-picture-taking virtual co-workers face to face instead of online?
  • Do you like being inspired by others?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then Indulge Conference is for YOU!

…and I can definitely answer new—yes—everyday—yes—yes, so I totally belong, right?

Anyone else planning to go to #IndulgeConPDX?

You can find our more on their website, Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram!  They were about 75% sold out a few days ago, so if you’re interested, get your ticket quick!  And then let me know you’re going so we can plan to meet 😀

I’m Having a Love Affair

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With Rosemary.

Rosemary Clooney?

No.  Well, yes.  I mean, it’s December, aren’t we all a little moon-eyed for her?

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{image via}

I’m talking about the herb though, that beautiful buttery Rosmarinus Officinalis.  Did you know it’s actually part of the mint family?  Wikipedia told me so.  Apparently it’s also a symbol of remembrance and love.  Now I like it even more.

I’ve always loved it, but a co-worker brought it in to work this week – one of those small bushes they shape like a Christmas tree – and I just can’t get enough.  I went out that same day and bought one for myself.  It smelled so good in the car that I broke off a sprig and stuck it in the vent.  Why have I never thought of doing that before?

I also maaaay have rubbed it on my wrists like perfume.  Is that weird?  Nevermind, don’t wanna know.

To feed this escalating obsession, I made Pioneer Woman’s Pot Roast the other night for dinner which just so happens to call for rosemary.  Our little apartment smelled amazing!

Living in an apartment building, there are some evenings that we come home and when the elevator doors open to our floor we’re knocked over by the drool-inducing aroma of someone’s dinner.  It’s extremely difficult not to sniff our way down the hall to figure out where it’s coming from and then knock on the door to invite ourselves in.  Well, that drool-inducing aroma was coming from our place for once, confirmed by Mr. Won’t Run who walked in the door and said “HAVE YOU SMELLED THE HALLWAY?!!”.  I earned bonus wife points for dinner that night.

I’ve actually considered giving in to my sniff/knock/eat fantasy, I mean, how big of a compliment would it be to have someone knock on your door because your food smells so good, right?  Unless you’re a single girl, then it might be a little scary, even if the dude is good-looking.  That might be a meet cute in a Hallmark movie, but in real life it’s asking to be murdered.  At least invite the guy back (talking through the door of course) at a later date when you can plan to have your friend hiding in the closet with mace for backup.

I know, my mind is a strange place, I’m blaming the rosemary high.

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{image via}

Do you have an herb you’re obsessed with?  Obsessed like a cat is obessed with catnip?  Share your crazy so I know I’m not alone.  Please.

Monday Love

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Another Monday Love already?!  At least it’s a Monday I don’t have to go to work!

As happy as I am about that, the reason we are able to enjoy a day off from work, hanging out with friends and family, eating BBQ, and shopping great sales is because of those who gave their lives.  A heartfelt thank you to them, and their families, for their ultimate sacrifice.

05.26.14-Memorial-Day(Image found via Google, posted on this site.)

To thank them for that sacrifice, let’s make sure we’re living our lives to the fullest, okay?

I am definitely making a Summer Bucket List and want to hike all the hikes!

Hopefully these DIY Ice Pops will suddenly appear in my freezer.

I’ll be cooking my way through Jessica’s cookbook when it arrives on my doorstep in 99 days – you know, stuff like this sweet+spicy masterpiece! #drool #drool #drool

I’ll surprise my kimchi loving husband with these burgers sometime soon.

And make him these potatoes which would go perfectly with some grilled steak.

And change up the breakfast routine with this smoothie, and this smoothie, and this no-bake granola bar, and this pie (!!!) bar.

Most importantly, tickets for Feast went on sale!!  You can view the schedule and buy tickets here.

And in Instagram life last week… got a pedicure, Koko has started hanging out in the bathtub, I got some sandals from Target I wasn’t too sure about, and date night at Serratto.

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That was my last week, how was yours?  Anything fun planned for this week?

Monday Love

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So… I had a Monday Love post for last week, but something happened with LiveWriter and I lost it and was too sad to rewrite it.  There is a small chance it could have been operator error, but I just don’t know.  And what the heck happened to auto-save, huh?!

So, Monday Love… the things I loved from the last week and think you should know about:

  • Joy the Baker is such a genius, Cheddar Buttermilk Waffle B.L.T. sandwiches!!
  • I love FoodBabe, and her recent info on Taco Bell and the glucose drink pregnant women have to chug for gestational diabetes testing were both quite interesting.
  • I’ve never used rhubarb before, not even sure I’ve ever eaten it, but this Strawberry Rhubarb Crisp might have to happen soon.  You don’t even need a bowl, just mix it in the pan!!  Hello easy breakfast idea!
  • I am still in love with my spiralizer, and this Deconstructed Manicotti Skillet looks delicious!  I’d have to make it just for me though since Mr. Won’t Run isn’t a zucchini fan.
  • With Summer and sunshine on its way, I won’t be turning on the oven unless absolutely necessary, so these No-Bake Dark Chocolate Granola Bites look like the perfect little snack or dessert when you just gotta have a little somethin’ sweet.
  • Another no-oven option is this Spicy Cilantro Mango Wild Rice from Running to the Kitchen; it’s a rice salad you serve chilled which sounds perfect for a backyard picnic!
  • Whipped.Coconut.Cream

Enough links, here’s what life looked like last week:

KokoPuffer had some hangry eyes for french fries:

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Costco had Stacy’s Pita Chips on sale so I had to stock up, those things are like crack!

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Had a fun date night at a new-to-us place, The Country Cat.  More details to come on that, but definitely check it out!

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And a quick trip to OHSU with a not-too-shabby view.

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That was my last week, how was yours?  Anything exciting planned for this week?

The view from OHSU {Portland, OR}

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I have lived in Oregon for almost 18 years, but today was the first time I have had a reason to go to OHSU.  You can take the aerial tram, which I plan to do someday just for fun, but today I drove myself up the hill.

I used the Maps app on my iPhone and freaked out a little when it started telling me to look for parking because I’d have to walk the rest of the way to my destination.  I ignored the nice Maps lady and kept driving – since, you know, there was a road – and thankfully it spit me out right at Kohler Pavilion where I needed to be.

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Why was I at OHSU?  Don’t worry, nothing serious, I was just taking the OHSU Labor and Delivery tour so I’d have the lay of the land when working with doula clients delivering there.  I’ve heard good things about OHSU, but I was really impressed with some of the info I read:

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I am so glad to live near a place with some great labor and delivery options that most hospitals aren’t willing or able to provide.  If we do have kids, I would absolutely look at delivering here.

I needed to go up to the 7th floor of the Kohler Pavilion, but I was a little early and when I got on the elevator I saw that there was an atrium on the 9th floor so I decided to check that out.  The 9th floor also happens to be where the aerial tram station is, and the view is pretty nice.  The Mountain wasn’t “out” today (and it would be a little more to the right of this photo), but it’s still a pretty view:

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Thanks to this favorite camera apps post from Kevin & Amanda, I had just downloaded 360 Panorama app, and figured this was the perfect place to try it out for the first time.  Just click and drag the image below to the left or the right to rotate the picture.  It’ll be like you were standing exactly where I was, seeing exactly what I saw.  So cool, right?!  What do you think?

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You can also click here to see it bigger in its own window which is pretty cool.

How’s that for a random post?  Hospitals and photo apps!